Nobody Wins a Fight

Brooklyn, NY

This morning a boy, whose behavior makes me feel like a bus has hit me nearly every week, was calm. I wondered how long it would be before he cranked himself up and I wanted to go jump off a cliff.

He walked over to the snack table where I was standing, looked up at me, broke into a smile, spread his arms wide and ran at me to give me the greatest bear hug. My heart grew two sizes.

Whatever the test was, we passed. He's not fighting us any more. And it was such a lovely day, even when he was threatening to beat up one of the other kids who got his jeans dirty. Nobody got punched. There was no real fight.

The the end of the day when we had our wrap-up circle, all of the kids were sharing something that they learned during the day. We had spent several hours out birding in the park and a lot of them shared new bird-related tidbits of knowledge. After going around the circle, one boy waved his hand up and down, wanting to share one more thing. "I learned that in a fight, nobody wins."

I agree whole-heartedly.

Last week, fighting. Nobody won. This week, no fighting. Everybody won.